Dopamine

Essentially, an individual’s possessions—both real and abstract—can be separated using a simple paradigm:

• the things you have
• the things you don’t

It follows, then, that the brain has evolved two modes of operation for the purpose of each. One mode deals with what you have, the other with what you don’t have but want. And because there are no other options, these two modes collectively form the totality of your behaviour. You’re either happy and content right here in the moment ‘being,’ or you’re trying to get or be something or somewhere else.

Sound familiar?

That’s why understanding this matters.

For simplicity, we’ll call these two modes ‘have’ and ‘want.’ In ‘have’ mode, you operate within the domain of what you already possess; in ‘want’ mode, you identify and acquire the things you want but don’t yet have.

Simple.

To transfer an object of desire from ‘want’ to ‘have’ requires identification, intention, and action.

Enter dopamine.

By definition, the things you have are here in the present moment. The things you want can only be had in the future. In between, you have to make things happen. (Or rather, dopamine makes you make things happen.) Only when the desired enters your possession do you finally have what you want. Having what you want then extinguishes the original desire. (Dopamine is retired.) Your brain and behaviour switch between these two modes in a balancing act of sustaining yourself with what you have and getting more.

This concept is extraordinarily important, so let’s take a closer look at what’s actually happening.

You can think of the system as a repeating cycle.

At any point in the cycle, we operate either in ‘want’ or ‘have’ mode. We continue to do so until conditions send us back towards the other. And so we continue, going around in circles, flipping from one to the other.

The ‘have’ mode operates when we are engaged in the present moment. It is overseen by neurotransmitters, such as serotonin, endorphins, and what are known as endocannabinoids. (The details are not particularly important; what matters is the overall concept.)

Because this mode of operation is configured for the present moment, the pathways and neurotransmitters facilitate a feeling of contentment and satisfaction. This state has no need for mental projection into either the past or the future, and you’re okay, right here, right now.

Examples of being in this mode include engaging in a good conversation or listening to music that makes you forget yourself and time—that kind of thing.

The ‘want’ mode is very different and seemingly more complex. First and foremost, when this mode activates, it draws you out of the present and thrusts you mentally into a future projection of possibility. The ‘have’ mode stands down.

This mode is fuelled by the neurotransmitter dopamine. We can also refer to this mode as the dopamine circuit. The dopamine circuit has the opposite function to the ‘have’ mode: it makes us dissatisfied with the present moment and propels us towards a future outcome. For clarity and to emphasise the importance of dopamine, this is worth repeating.

Dopamine is often associated with pleasure, but—as we’ll cover in a moment—wanting something and enjoying it are not the same. Think of an itch: you’re driven to scratch because you want the discomfort to stop. The satisfaction is in the relief.

That’s why you think about the next drink before you’ve finished the one you have. You’re not enjoying it; you’re craving it. Enjoying things happens in ‘have’ mode.

For evolutionary purposes, this system gets us the resources we need for survival: food, reproduction, and so on. The resources we need—or perceive we need—in modern societies are much more complex. The ‘want’ mode isn’t designed for such rich environments, so herein lies the potential for things to go awry.

Activation of this mode (dopamine release) occurs when you experience an element of excitement in your world. When you encounter something new or unexpected, it signifies possibility: the potential for resources directly or the means to obtain or maximise resources indirectly. This sets the dopamine-driven functioning of the cycle in motion.

From here, alert and motivated, you investigate, strategise, and extract—where possible—what you can. Once you exhaust all possibilities and the new becomes normal, dopamine has done its job.

Dopamine’s exhaustion then returns you to ‘have’ mode. You stay there until you encounter the next deviation from the known and are thrust into ‘want’ mode again. That is, under normal circumstances.

Restless Wanting

In dopamine-rich environments—like the ones in which we find ourselves—‘want’ mode switches on for all manner of reasons, many with no clear destination or defined point of satisfaction. The dissatisfaction can then leak sideways: food, shopping, a drink—other possibilities become potential ways to settle a feeling they didn’t originally provoke. You’re searching for an answer to a demand that has no clear answer.

Spend half an hour doomscrolling, fuelled by dopamine, and that’s why you feel so dissatisfied and scattered when you put your phone down: your attention is still jumping between possibilities, searching for something to pursue. But being driven to pursue something doesn’t mean you’ll enjoy what you get—or like where the pursuit takes you.

Dopamine Made Me Do It

The behaviour required for survival doesn’t necessarily align with what you like. This is especially true in the long term. The system fulfils its survival requirements now; you’re alive to deal with the unintended consequences later.

An obvious example of this disconnect is refined sugar—a concentrated energy source that was relatively scarce until recently. Your dopamine system drives you to binge on it because it perceives it as scarce. You might not have access to it again any time soon, so you’d better stock up.

Today, sugar is abundant, so bingeing on it provides no survival advantage whatsoever. Quite the opposite: it’s unhealthy. You might survive today, but what about tomorrow? When you eat too much, you gain weight and increase various health-related risks.

The myopic dopamine system presses on and makes us want it now, whether we need it or not. Over time, the consequences of overeating become noticeable, undesirable, and in conflict with the immediate priorities of the dopamine system. Do you like this? Probably not. And so the difference between ‘want’ and ‘like’ becomes evident. The same dynamic applies to alcohol: even when its effects are clearly ruining us, the wanting does not subside. While sugar provides perceived physical sustenance, it seems alcohol provides emotional sustenance—or at least it numbs the lack of it.

Unfortunately, the dopamine system isn’t voluntary. It is completely reactive, and whenever it fires, you are in it for the ride, whether you like it or not. You go through the motions until you get what you want, or the dopamine burns itself out and gives up. When the dopamine subsides, we are left with the fruits of our dopamine-fuelled behaviour as we transition back to the ‘have’ mode.

Enough Is Never Enough

In theory, the system should self-regulate, but for the dependent, things have gone awry: sometimes, there’s a glitch in the cycle.

Eventually, most people reach a threshold—enough is enough. The dopamine stops flowing, and we stop. The bad news for the dependent is that dopamine just keeps coming. The system doesn’t recognise ‘enough.’ It never shuts down, and we get stuck in ‘want’ mode. By definition, this mode is not, and cannot be, satisfied. That’s not what it’s for. And because the dopamine never stops, away we go. It only ends when it’s no longer possible to get what it wants: you run out of alcohol, run out of money, or pass out.

What you wake up to is deep dissatisfaction. It was never physically or mentally healthy to want or do what we did. We neither needed nor liked the outcome; we only wanted it. The gap between just one drink and waking up after passing out is filled with promises of ‘one more won’t hurt.’ This is a very revealing phrase: we go from ‘a drink would be nice’ to ‘one more won’t hurt.’ Dopamine carries us across the line from sensible to harmful—a crossing the conscious mind then rationalises.

My suspicion is that alcohol provides a sense of connection and acceptance convincing enough to fool the dopamine system into firing—it reads the artificial as a genuine survival opportunity, so it makes you want it. But wanting only resolves once the need is actually met, and here the deception runs out: there’s nothing real underneath to register as ‘secured.’ So the system never gets the signal to power down. It got fooled into starting, but there’s nothing there to let it stop. This may or may not be accurate, but what’s certain is that whatever is at the end of alcohol-fuelled dopamine isn’t satisfaction. Ever.

You never wake up the next morning and think, ‘Well, I’m glad I did all that. Yes. Lovely. What’s for breakfast?’

The good news is that you can and do want different things. You can want diametrically opposed things. If you are reading this, then you clearly don’t want to be drinking. But also, you do want to drink because you do. We therefore have an interesting conflict where dopamine appears to be in direct competition with itself.

Essentially, the winner is whichever desire is stronger, although what exactly defines strength in terms of dopaminergic desires is complex. There are many factors: time, place, energy levels, environment, people. It’s difficult to know and understand them all.

To complicate matters, they’re dynamic, too: a factor’s weight shifts in context. Observation of yourself, your behaviour, and these competing desires will help you to understand them. As we will see later, awareness is the first step towards change. Like a muscle, you can exercise and strengthen healthy desires and let the undesirable ones atrophy.

The part of you that wants to stop is already ascending, and it’s dopamine compelling you to keep reading. You see the possibility of something better. Dopamine will continue to propel you forward because you want it. From here, you just need to accumulate enough knowledge and experience to strengthen that desire and overcome the other—permanently. It’s important then, to understand the dopamine circuit in a little more detail.

The dopamine circuit comprises two sequential but distinct functions. Each of these functions performs a different role in the act of getting something. Understanding this structure will help you to weaponise the dopamine system against itself and put you in a position of strength moving forward.

Desire Circuit

The first of the two functions is called the dopamine desire circuit. The desire circuit is the part of the dopamine system that involuntarily fires in response to certain stimuli. (You can consider this a subset of the subconscious mind.) When the desire circuit activates, dopamine draws your attention, focuses the mind, and produces desire for a particular object or outcome. It has no plan for getting whatever it has set its eyes on; it just stimulates pure desire for whatever it is. ‘Get me that.’

When it comes to competing desires, a weighing process takes place. The relative weight of contradictory desires—pulling in opposite directions—depends on the wider context and various other factors.

The desire to drink is heavily influenced by factors such as who you are with, where you are, and how you feel. These elements are bundled together and determine the weight of that desire at that time and in that context.

One of the two conflicting desires outcompetes the other, and the scales tip in its favour. The winning desire is then fed to the second of the two functions.

The second function is known as the dopamine control circuit. (You can consider this a subset of the conscious mind.) Once the desire has been stimulated, the job of the control circuit—again powered by dopamine—is to work out the following:

1. Whether it’s worth it.
2. How to get results.
3. How to maximise those results.

It thinks, strategises, plans, and implements whatever it deems to be the best course of action.

The following illustrates this relationship: the dominant desire circuit decides what it wants and instructs the subservient control circuit to go and do its bidding.

You can think of the desire circuit like a child who sees a new toy advertised on TV. They identify it as something they simply must have, even though it costs a fortune. They then relentlessly pester their parents to get it. The parents (the control circuit), not wanting to upset the child, will look into whether they can afford it, where they can get it cheapest, whether discount codes are available, and so on. If they can make it happen, they’ll execute the plan and get the toy. If the cost is too high, or the sacrifice elsewhere is too great, they’ll back out and try to deal with the child nagging.

• If the desire circuit determines that it wants to drink more than not, the control circuit goes to work to make it happen: ‘Where can I buy alcohol? Do I need money? How can I get there?’
• If the desire circuit determines that it doesn’t want to drink more than it does, the control circuit goes to work to make that happen instead: ‘Where can I get help? What excuse can I give for not going to the party? How do I get to sleep without a drink?’

Cooperation

So basically, that’s what’s going on here. Dopamine and its related systems wield significant influence on your behaviour, and this is how.

Now that you understand this, you can aim to cooperate with this system rather than fight against it. You can incentivise it to want what you really want—not whatever takes its fancy. Otherwise, it will just keep doing what it does, and you’ll be going along for the ride.